Pauli Bday Present/God is a cockroach

FOR PAULI-NEE-CHAN. MY SON IS BETTER THAN YOURS. XD




There are many stories about Christ other than just the Nativity. There are even more that have not been told; about Jesus's time with the AntiChrist.
As the son of God, Jesus could go to different times (SURELY! He;s the son of an omnipotent being for something's sake ;P) ; so he took himself and the ANticHrist to a time where they could be accepted.
Our time.

Under the name of GayLord and Humphrey (they chose each other's names), the two lived happily as a gay couple where they could not have done before. Of course, this meant they had to be reborn, but the two had loving families, albeit maybe not normal ones.


They were still happy.

Until God found out one day, and all hell broke loose.

"Why is your father a cockroach anyway? Couldn't you just step on him?"
"Well.. yeah.. but that would be deicide."
"What is the punishment for Deicide?"
"Humphrey, NO."

Life could still have gone on normally for Humphrey and GayLord, until God went to see their 'parents'.


And so GayLord and Humphrey were left alone, to rule the world, such as they might.

Until it was discovered Humphrey was just a possessed sock puppet..


Oh, never mind. They lived happily ever after ;D

CURRY POTTER

THATS RIGHT.
CURRY POTTER HAS FINALLY COME TO YOUR COMPUTERS.
Set after my other Harry Potter story, lets see what had happened in the six months since the group last met... STARRING COLIN MOCHRIE AS THE SNACK FAIRY!!!!!
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*checks watch* Ten minutes,.. hope I won't be late..
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RON???
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RONALD WEASLEY???
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*turning* Hermione??!! What are you doing here??
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Shopping.. you??
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Shopping? In the Muggle world?
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Well.. Yeah. Thing is.. I need a wedding dress.
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A what? ...Who-?
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Guys??
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Woahwoahwoahwoahwoahwoaoooooooah... Harry???
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What the hell are you wearing? I mean -- how are you????
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Yoyoyo peace and luuuurve guys!! We havent seen each other in laik, six months, so lets gogogo get some coffee together and catch up, yusss? I'll be goin' huntin' for a hole table thing for uz, come over in a sec y'all!! *wanders off*
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Wooolala. What the fuck happened to him??
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I remember the twins saying they were using him as a guinea pig. The brain damage may be permanent.
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Such a shame. He could have been a great wizard.
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Yeah. Anyway, you go talk to him, I need to call my boss and tell him I'm not coming in today.
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...Boss?? You work in the Muggle world?
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Yes I do. IT, you see. I am a computer wizard! Haha. *walks of with phone*
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*sits down with Harry* So! What have you been up to?
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This an' that, here and there, up and down, y'know how it is, yarr. But yuss.. yussyussyussyuss.. Yeegodd, I need more heroin. What brings yah to the muggle world, Hermioninny?
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....Are you all right?
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Course I is, an' I'll be even better after my daily dose ofv coffee and LSD, yeah. You ever tried it?
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No.
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Iss very good, ferry good. Better even than some of the Weaselly twins's stuff, and thatss ssaying ssomessin'.
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Yo Harry! How are you, old friend?
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Yo Wonald, like Wonald the ducky-duck. Ize jiiiuust faiiine. I gotz something to tell youz though.
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What?
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Youz be promissin' not to tell 'nyone?
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We promise..
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*leans forward* I beez going to INDIAH. *leans back, satisfied*
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(pause)
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..You're going to India..?
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S'right.
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Um, Harry.. why?
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Get Tch'selves comfy, cos this might take a while. I ordered coffee for yaz, by the by the road. So yuss. Those drugs that yo' Brothers pumped intah meh, Wonald.. they have given meh an insight into the supernaturaal.
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Harry.. you are a wizard. You ARE supernatural.
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Oh yuss, guys, you no be callin me Harry no moar. I changed my name.
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..what to?
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An indiahn name. Curry Pottah.
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(pause)
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... ok. Ok.. that makes sense.. curry is indian.. yeah..
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And I beez goin to Indiah to find enlightenment.
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*nods* Good luck.
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Thank youz. So w'sup wit you all?
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Yeah Hermione. C-congratulations on getting engaged. Who's the guy?
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Iss 'Snape.
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*turns* How did you know that??
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I been stalkin' youz. *falls asleep*
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It.. worked out with you and Snape, then?
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*Oh, yes. Its just great. He teaches me things, and spoils me. And I- lets not go into what I do for him.
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Thanks for that image Hermione. *shudders* So.. you invting anyone to the wedding?
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Oh yes, its not for a few months yet! So, Ron.. How did things work out for you and Malfoy?
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...not so good. He.. well, he's gone mad.
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What happened?
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It was really weird. He got this.. fetish.. with a celebrity TV chef. It is taking over his life. He is trying to become as succesful as him. I-oh. Here he comes.
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What? Where?
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Over there.
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His hair..
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Whatever you do, DONT LAUGH AT HIS HAIR. I did.
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What happened?
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Oh, he tried to kill me.
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I guess that broke the relationship, huh? Hello.. Malfoy..?
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Please. Call me Gary.
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......GARY??
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Gary Malfoy-Rhodes. Its my new name.
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Right. Ok. Ok...
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Hey, Ronaldd. I set up a date for you. Would you like to see a picture before you automatically say no?
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Do I have a choice?
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He's a popular guy with us chefs. I have a picture.. here.
--

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... you want me to go out with a snack fairy?
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Thats what most call him. But his friends call him... Colin. Shall I call him?
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Naah, I'm not bothered.
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Call him.
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Harry Potter.
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Its Curry Pottah. Call him. He holds the key..
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*raising an eyebrow at Hermione and Ron* Exactly how many drugs is he on?
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Just call the dude.
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Fair enough. *calls* I say, Mudblood, how do you feel about TV chefs?
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How do you feel about getting your ass kicked by Snape?
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Good answer.
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Hello?
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Ohmygod Its a Frickin' Hobo.
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No its not.. He does exist? I thought that was a damn good bit of photoshopping.
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I am indeed the Snack Fairy. I do have.. other powers, however..
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Can you heal drugged out people?
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I am sure I can try, for all wands are the sa- *staring* Who.. is this..?
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Snack Fairy..
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He's Harry Potter.
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Harry Potter...
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Call me Curry..
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Call me Colin..
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Colin..
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Curry..
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Let's get out of here. Now..
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Hermione, Gary and Ron leave
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Colin.. I will do anything for you..
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Anything?
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Anything.
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Even Rehab?
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Rehab..
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It is the only way..
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I will go to rehab for you.. Colin..
--
Curry..


------END-------

Oh gods, I am ashamed of the end. Sorry, Im tired.
SQUEE FINISHED! HAHA
Harry